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Thursday, May 2, 2013

Hello

Okay, so my last post was weak and useless. I read it this morning and felt myself slide down a slippery slope into a pond of greasy, grimy gopher guts, neck deep, all the while spying the troll following me, a bucket of pig poop swinging from one three fingered hand, arking ever higher as he descended the decline, letting it loose in a trajectory destined for my head, the process agonizingly slow, giving me much to much time to worry over whether or not I should duck. Of course I faltered at the last second, indecisive, my knees bending only slightly as the bucket took flight, my face, half submerged, receiving the maw of the pail dead center, vile excrement exiting, my hesitation costly as I collect the inundation of both fetid horrors. And to think that my punishment for a lazy, pathetic post consists of such gross description!  I tend to believe that rather than the punishment fitting the crime, the CRIME is the punishment, perpetrated upon you, the reader. Tell me, what did you do to deserve such severe literary torture?

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