Today is one of those rare times when I find myself alone, expecting my solitude to last all day. Amy is nervous at the thought I might fall or otherwise injure myself, unable to recover to a phone. I carry my cell with me, so unless I render myself unconscious, in which case I can get some rest, I can call 911 or the morgue or whatever. I jest because I'm not worried. I don't have any plans to crack a tibia, and if I had, I don't do a very good job of following through with my schedule anyway.
A current event: Last night Amy took me to the new Golden Corral. First, I apologise to anyone offended by my critique. Maybe your experience was more pleasant. We arrived around 5:30, the place was hoppin', folks lined up slightly out the door. Once we got inside, customers were rounded up and guided through a short maze not unlike a ride at six flags. I looked ahead for a ramp leading into a cattle confinement station. At the counter, we picked up our cafeteria tray, loaded two drinks, moved along, paid almost 28 bucks (exorbitant) and waited a short time for a table, navigating ourselves through the hustle and bustle of patrons hauling food from various stations. We were seated at a table possibly large enough for four, crammed in with a dozen other tables, mostly occupied, chairs bumping, medium level chaos all around us. Now, I wasn't expecting Texas De Brazil, but this was much too reminiscent of my high school cafeteria to be enjoyable. The construction of the place screams CHEAP, light fixtures hanging from the ceiling, blindingly bright, might have been picked up at Unclaimed Freight or Walmart. The ambiance would have improved with a couple dozen 8 foot florescent tubes- you know, shop lights. Looking across to an East wall you can see the fluid filling station for the waitresses, in all its glory: soda machines, coffee dispensers, large trash cans, wash tub, supplies, all in plain view, undisguised by partition or curtain.. Now, sometimes I like to catch a glimpse of an open kitchen, but I never, ever want to eat in full view of the scullery. I have something of an eye for design, and it is obvious that nobody spent too long on the spacial relations desk with this place. Small front foyer plus large dining area equals lines out the door. Wait. I'm wrong. Once the word gets out, the foyer will become huge and vacant and half the dining area will be converted to volley ball, accessible through a side entrance. For now, the tables are too close together, the staff uses your table, while you're eating, as a staging area for dirty plates. I actually had to pull in my largely worthless left arm to allow space for a bus tub while the waitress (loose term in this case) took plates from the adjacent table. I was almost claustrophobic; I swear I could smell the arm pits of everyone who passed by. I couldn't help but be reminded of the original Blues Brothers move when they sang "Rawhide", whips crackin' and references to round' em' up. I now understand the name "Corral", I dare not even ask about the "Golden". Possibly I'm not qualified- I never visited the restroom. (sorry, overshare).
Oh, yeah, the food. Salty, but not bad. I'll have a proxy check it out in a year, providing the place hasn't been converted into a Weight Watchers Center.
What I find funniest about this post, besides your hilarious and undoubtedly accurate description of the "ambiance" at Golden Corral, is that you seem to have expected GOLDEN CORRAL to have AMBIANCE. I noted the disclaimer that said you weren't expecting Texas de Brazil, but then, what were you expecting exactly? That description pretty much sums up the image I have of a place whose slogan is, "Help yourself to Happiness". We need to get you here, stat, so we can treat you to some real food and ambiance!!
ReplyDeleteOh, and call me if you get bored today :).
ReplyDeleteThat cracks me up! I remember when I was a kid and the BIG family outing was to Bonanza Steak House. The steaks were so thin all they had to do was wave the beef over the grill and they would be well done and the trough-o-salad was something to be desired. Vege's weren't cool when we were young. Strangely though, all the kids LOVED the place, because we got to eat out!
ReplyDeleteJust a thought, Tracy. When I was diagnosed, they all told me to keep up my weight. I thought "best news I ever heard!", and the reason they gave me was "Your weight is going to drop dramatically, and your metabolism is going to speed up, because every task is going to use up tons of energy". So I ate like crazy, and whatever I wanted. Not only did I get fat, but then I had to be treated for hypertension. I continue to e heavy and I cannot drop the weight. I have also begun to go almost vegetarian and eat healthy. Eventually, you may want to rethink "Golden Corral" and concentrate on lots of fruits and vegetables to boost your immunity and whole grains to provide fiber. Most ALS patients die from infections, especially pneumonia. And, to get hypertension, diabetes, or cancer on top of the ALS is hell. Don't forget to lead a healthy life, cut down on junky processed foods, and replace the animal fats with healthier fats like fish and vegetable oils, and replace white with dark -- like replace white enriched flour with whole wheat, and white sugar with honey or agave nectar. Your energy level will be better for it.
ReplyDeleteno desire to go there!!!
ReplyDelete