Insidiousness prevails within me. No matter what I do, the worm that is Gehrig burrows throughout my insides at a relentless crawl. From my idiotic diagnosis in March of '11 until this very moment, with all certainty beyond and with obstacles strewn along its path until the ultimate disaster ensues, I remain witness and cultivator to and of the grand daddy disease. I am nonplussed, at least. I'm severely pissed off, more accurate.
What am I doing? All I can handle, less than I should, as much as I can understand, not nearly as much as my wife. She is constantly on point with nutrition, detoxification, exercise, belief, hope, faith, love, nurture, joy, forgiveness, therapy, education, spirituality, loyalty, interaction, social involvement and communication. I pull up a distant second, proving pathetic in my inability to absorb even a small percentage of her insight, no a modicum of the concepts of many of her array of attributes. I am in a sea without shoreline, sinking with the weight of my mindset, trying to sprout gills of hope and serenity, all the while anchored by my shortcomings of imagination.
On the other hand, I continually search for the mechanism that eludes me: That device enabling those who have won their battles, those who have walked from the sea, those who can look back and relish the escape they have made, those I might join on the beach.
I've become part of Reddit. Look for me under ALS.
My neck is weak. I need a horseshoe pillow.
Tomorrow I write on a good time. Share this blog with those who want to read my story and I will write until I'm blind.
What am I doing? All I can handle, less than I should, as much as I can understand, not nearly as much as my wife. She is constantly on point with nutrition, detoxification, exercise, belief, hope, faith, love, nurture, joy, forgiveness, therapy, education, spirituality, loyalty, interaction, social involvement and communication. I pull up a distant second, proving pathetic in my inability to absorb even a small percentage of her insight, no a modicum of the concepts of many of her array of attributes. I am in a sea without shoreline, sinking with the weight of my mindset, trying to sprout gills of hope and serenity, all the while anchored by my shortcomings of imagination.
On the other hand, I continually search for the mechanism that eludes me: That device enabling those who have won their battles, those who have walked from the sea, those who can look back and relish the escape they have made, those I might join on the beach.
I've become part of Reddit. Look for me under ALS.
My neck is weak. I need a horseshoe pillow.
Tomorrow I write on a good time. Share this blog with those who want to read my story and I will write until I'm blind.
If I had all the answers you would already be healed. Together we can figure it out.
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