Meditation. I'm going to say that most people have no idea just what it is. Fewer still achieve it. Let me tell you why.
I've spent many an hour meditating. Or so I thought. I was never there. Never. Meditation is not daydreaming or relaxing or sleeping or trance, but possibly all of those and more. I simply can't tell you. I can only speak of my recent discovery, my recent breakthrough, my recent realization. Don't get hung up on the words of choice like alpha, beta and theta. I've been able to drop a biofeedback machine with ease for years. It really has nothing to do with meditation. It merely demonstrates my ability to disengage the anxiety roaming my nervous system.
Cutting to the chase, I feel I've actually achieved a level of meditation that is real, tangible, controllable. The effort is effortless, as effort in itself denies the event. Here's what I experience:
After believing I was meditating for hours, I began to realize that I had an awareness of every sound, every flash of light, the clock on the wall, the temperature, the itch on my nose, the position of my arms, the position of my legs, the pain in my back and my neck, the nervous twitches that are continual, what was on television that night........ The pasty drool draining from the right side of my mouth as my head lolled in feigned relaxation.
It was all a self inflicted ruse. Until it got real.
I'm not sure when it happened or how long it lasted. I'm sure it was real. All senses exterior vanished. The only sense I had was of my breathing. In, out. Balance. Everything else was gone. Time had no meaning. The sense of a required balance led me to believe that this was my only path to health. It transcends logic, my singular largest barrier. The ultimate success is not in being right, but being in a moment free of tangibles. I found that moment. Or that eternity. Doesn't matter which. I'm convinced time is inconsequential here, in this state.
Detailed, I'm just breath. The air blooms and flows and is all important. If I can succeed to maintain equilibrium, the sensation remains.
This feels like it is internal. I'm not sensing any supreme entity or energy. Minimalism at the source.
I'm hoping this is going to be commonplace in my experiences and not just the result of oxygen deprivation. I'm thinking not the latter.
As for the long term effects of learning to REALLY meditate, I'm going to find out something, or it will become another mystery in a long list that I need to solve.
I will be meditating more every day in order to unlock my brain and find the switch that decides my future.
For those who read my blog this is bizarre, even for me. I'll keep you posted. (pun).
I've spent many an hour meditating. Or so I thought. I was never there. Never. Meditation is not daydreaming or relaxing or sleeping or trance, but possibly all of those and more. I simply can't tell you. I can only speak of my recent discovery, my recent breakthrough, my recent realization. Don't get hung up on the words of choice like alpha, beta and theta. I've been able to drop a biofeedback machine with ease for years. It really has nothing to do with meditation. It merely demonstrates my ability to disengage the anxiety roaming my nervous system.
Cutting to the chase, I feel I've actually achieved a level of meditation that is real, tangible, controllable. The effort is effortless, as effort in itself denies the event. Here's what I experience:
After believing I was meditating for hours, I began to realize that I had an awareness of every sound, every flash of light, the clock on the wall, the temperature, the itch on my nose, the position of my arms, the position of my legs, the pain in my back and my neck, the nervous twitches that are continual, what was on television that night........ The pasty drool draining from the right side of my mouth as my head lolled in feigned relaxation.
It was all a self inflicted ruse. Until it got real.
I'm not sure when it happened or how long it lasted. I'm sure it was real. All senses exterior vanished. The only sense I had was of my breathing. In, out. Balance. Everything else was gone. Time had no meaning. The sense of a required balance led me to believe that this was my only path to health. It transcends logic, my singular largest barrier. The ultimate success is not in being right, but being in a moment free of tangibles. I found that moment. Or that eternity. Doesn't matter which. I'm convinced time is inconsequential here, in this state.
Detailed, I'm just breath. The air blooms and flows and is all important. If I can succeed to maintain equilibrium, the sensation remains.
This feels like it is internal. I'm not sensing any supreme entity or energy. Minimalism at the source.
I'm hoping this is going to be commonplace in my experiences and not just the result of oxygen deprivation. I'm thinking not the latter.
As for the long term effects of learning to REALLY meditate, I'm going to find out something, or it will become another mystery in a long list that I need to solve.
I will be meditating more every day in order to unlock my brain and find the switch that decides my future.
For those who read my blog this is bizarre, even for me. I'll keep you posted. (pun).
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